Monday, April 27, 2015

The Ups! The Downs!

Today, I had more than my share of teen drama.  Good lord.  Where do I even start?

Nate has two really good friends:  L & L, who are twin brothers.  Last week their mother died of a sudden heart attack, just out of the blue.  This was difficult for Nate to navigate:  thirteen-year-old boys don't have the most delicate social sensibilities.  He really wanted to be a good friend; so we went to the funeral together, and I encouraged him to text them every few days to say, "Hi".  They returned to school this week; and this weekend is their thirteenth birthday.  Their father has planned an epic blowout.  They are going to go to the amusement park in a big RV, spend the whole day there, then spend the night in the RV in the amusement park parking lot.  Even Sara said, "Dude, that sounds SICK!" (which is a good thing, by the way.)  Only problem is that he has a soccer match scheduled that day.  After initially saying that he had to miss the party for the soccer match, because he has already committed to the match, I relented in the name of his friends, who could use a few laughs.  But how to finesse it with his coach?  And his dad?  I do not like lying.  But I have to admit that, "Coach, I need to skip the match so I can go to my friends' birthday party." makes me want to come up with something different.

The best story today, though, comes from Sara.  Sara has a boyfriend named Ilan; and last month, they attended his ROTC ball together.  So, when they discussed his senior prom, they decided not to go.  Neither of them felt like it.  Then Ilan texted Sara last night to report that his dad is making him go.  MAKING?  How do MAKE a kid go to prom?  What ever happened to the good old days and, "I'm not going and YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!" Ilan isn't good at saying no to his dad, though.  His dad insists that it is a once-in-a-lifetime event, and cannot be missed.  Sara really doesn't want to go.  She and Ilan go to different schools, so she won't know anyone.  I'm on her side; except that, since Ilan has to go, she should support him by going.  After some eye-rolling and quavering exclamations out why she shouldn't have to do this, she agreed.

Renewed upset his afternoon when she realized we were going to need to get him a button-hole.  No worries, I told her. We'll get him something cream-colored to go with your cream and gold dress.   But check on the color of his suit. 

He will be wearing a tux.

He will be wearing his father's tux.  His dad used to be a hot-shit banker in Singapore and had all of his suits tailored.  I assured Sara that Ilan would look great in a tux, and that her dress is adequate to be worn in the presence of the tux. 

Ilan texted again to say the tux was black and gold.  I was trying to picture it.  Black and gold? 

Ian sent her a picture of the tux.  It was definitely tailored in Singapore.  It is Singaporean in its style, complete with Nehru collar and wide gold trim.  Since Ilan's family hails from India and he is comfortable in his Asian skin, I think he is going to pull it off perfectly and look smashing.  There are no lapels, so I'm not totally sure how the button-hole fits into the picture, but we can figure it out. 

Sara was beside herself.  They will look ridiculous!  The other kids will spend the evening judging her and Ilan. 

Mom, prom is all about the judging! 

Makes me wish that now, as a middle aged woman, I could go to prom.  Chuck and I would have a ball!  We would wear coordinated outfits, laugh too loudly and make unreasonable music requests.  "Ma-vis!  Sta-ples!  Ma-vis! Sta-ples!"  Sara was not amused. 


  1. I didn't go to my senior prom and I don't regret it to this day :) So wonder why Ian's father is pushing it so much? Son didn't go to his, but when his girlfriend 2 years later wanted to go to her's, we helped make it a special time for them so it was like going to his, LOL :)

    So sorry about your son's friends' mother. Definitely don't want to lie about missing the soccer game, but at the same time how to convey the message to the coach, his dad that perhaps this time being with friends in their hour of sadness is more important than a game.

    Here I'm bemoaning the fact my kids are raised and now I'm thinking "oh I'm glad we're done with the teen years." You will live through them.....barely.... :)


  2. So sad about Nates friend's mum. I hope the coach understands it's the boys first birthday without their mum, they need their friends around. And yes, I'd love to go to a ball with Mark. But I guess life is less complicated as you get older. We would just drink and laugh. And I would request Wham!