I am sitting cross-legged on the floor, 'cause I have a knee fetish and the gate is full of travelers about to board for Detroit. Must control myself...! No licking allowed... No, actually, I am taking advantage of the outlet in this pillar I am leaning against. My battery is getting old.
I enjoy traveling; and although I miss my kids already, I sometimes enjoy traveling alone. In think it is because so little is required of me. All I have to do is make my way from A to B. I am anonymous. If I want to, I can be completely silent for the next six hours. And I want to.
I can smell french fries. I wasn't hungry in SLC, but I am now.
I find all the people incredibly entertaining. Of course, I knew someone on the flight from SLC - that almost always happens. Today it was my old friend Krzyszek, who used to tutor at Guadalupe. I have only managed to find three Polaks in SLC, and he is one of them. We looked at each other twice, then laughed in recognition. I gave him a quick hug and kiss, but I was blocking the aisle and had to keep moving.
I generally can't sleep on the plane, and this flight was very cold. But I am so exhausted - kept reading the same paragraph in Newsweek over and over. Finally, I put my jeans jacket on backward and unfolded my orange scarf, which is actually a pashmina. I wrapped my legs in it, and I was snug, if a little odd-looking. I dozed fitfully.
When asleep, I was visited by the person who always visits me when I am half-asleep. It's been almost a month since I have seen his smile. I wish I could say that I miss him less or that my feeings are fading. They are not. Despite my efforts, the longing is intense. My mantras: pass the time with work and play. Be strong. Be ready for the happy outcome. Be ready, too, never to see him again. A little more time will pass and then I will know, one way or the other. Then the rest of my life will commence, in some form. What is it? Day 25.
When awake, I spied on people through my lashes. The lady next to me was reviewing a brief. She works for the Bureau of Reclamation, I deduced. I peeked at her charts and read up on Glen Canyon waterflows. Across the aisle, 2-year-old Eliza was giving her mother fits. She started off well, but got bored and twitchy on her mom's lap. You know how, when a kid that age doesn't want to do something, they have that way of arching their bodies? Screaming, "NOOOOOOOOO!" I remember flying with kids that age. I got lucky, though. Neither of them ever had a tantrum.
[Looks like my gate has been changed. Oh, well. I will move later. I'm comfy here.]
Yesterday was a very long day. I had to:
- Do the usual kids-to-school routine.
- Rec Center. Run about four miles.
- To Guadalupe and straight into a meeting with my boss. She asked me if I had a lot on my plate that day and I said I did. She looked pained, but told me that she needs me to write a short piece for United Way on how we teach our students about money and personal finance. Sure! When do you need it? Friday? Uhhhh... Guess I'll write it in Denver. I have a layover.
- Phone calls to return.
- E-mail triage. I only dealt with the ones that couldn't wait 'til later. One from brother Charles. OK if he lends me a car with a manual transmission? Awesome! I dislike driving automatics. My left foot is always paddling at the empty air.
- Strap on my paper-crampons and begin the final assault on the summit of Mount Paperwork. Melanie helps me. Ray takes over the phones and tells callers I'm in a meeting.
- Girls on the Run.
- I go to the TOSH complex on my way home because I need a physical if I want to go to San Luis Obispo next month. Luckily, the Girl Scout troop leader is also a pediatrician... I piss in a cup, get my blood pressure checked and let Julia listen to me breathe in an examining room decorated with clowns and giant diagrams of ear infections. We have a quick gossip-fest about which moms are going, which moms are whining already, whether we'll be able to smuggle a couple bottles of wine along, etc... The important stuff. All Girl Scout paperwork now SENT!
- Grocery store.
- Home. Sweet potatoes in the oven to roast.
- Toss an old sweater over my work clothes and head outside. Water my baby plants and my soon-to-be lettuce patch.
- Get a shovel and dig a big hole. Enjoy this immensely. Plant my new Burning Bush.
- It's getting late. Si will be home from his adult league soccer match pretty soon. Salmon on. Broccoli on.
- Supper as soon as Si gets in the door.
- Check in for flight on-line.
- Back to Guadalupe, I'm afraid. I pulled off my old sweater and grabbed my purse. Si gave me a look and said, "Wow. You look really nice for someone who is just going to work alone at her office." WTF!?! "Si. I have been wearing this all day." No reply. "I just had an old sweater over it, is all." No reply. I realize that I am sounding defensive. Mmmmmph. "Do you really think that I am meeting a man rather than going to the office?!?" Well, no. Not really. Uuuugh! Y'know, if I didn't spend so much time fighting with him about stuff like this, I wouldn't be so behind at work. Just sayin'...
- I got to the office at 10:30. Conquered Mount Paperwork! The staff will be so proud of me! They finally have the updated reports they need. And I am now in relaxed mode, and can enjoy the rest of the school year, stress free! Aaaaaaahhh! BUT. I still have to create the monthly student newspaper. And plan my lessons for tomorrow night (Everybody! Read the student newspaper!). Leave a note for Kristen, who is subbing for me. Leave a memo for the staff, reminding them of things that need to get done tomorrow night.
- Home. I am not going to say what the time was. Body slam my mattress. YES! Now, just in case you think I'm one of those people who can't go anywhere unless her desk is totally clear, it's not true! I can prove it! I didn't even glance at my mail. I didn't empty "Kate's Scary In-Box". I left all the murky coffee, tea and soup mugs on my crusty desk. So there.
- Strangely, I decided to blow off blogging.
As we drove along, he told me that he had called the mortgage company, and that the news was bad. We refinanced last fall for a fabulous interest rate (3.8%!), but now they tell him that they can't change the terms of the loan or refinance it or allow Simon to assume it on his own until a year has passed. I am not sure that this is a game-changer for me in any way. I don't think so. I would ponder further, but my brain is fairly fried. For the next four nights, I plan to sleep 8 hours a night. I will perhaps talk the mortgage issue over with my brother. Having a friendly adult partner-type person to talk with each day is a great privilege. I see that now. Even an absence of hostility feels like a balm.
My butt is numb. I should go find the correct gate for Milwaukee. I will stare at five women with beautiful, thin legs until I don't want french fries any more.
[Ah, yes. This is the right gate. I know that accent anywhere.]