Wednesday, April 20, 2011


To:  The World
From:  Kate
Re:  My current emotional state and the need to be nice to me

Day 2 of Detox is over and we are embarking upon Day 3.  All I can say for Day 2 was that it was busy.  I kept hoping that being busy would help me feel better.  Nope.  Welcome to my world.  Jump and shout.

It was an overall sucky day, which is why being busy didn't help. 

Simon is now barely speaking to me, which creates a really nasty atmosphere in the house.  I have hated this for 18 years and continue to hate it.

The server for Rosetta Stone is still down.

Eleven tutors called in absent.

I had to go through my e-mails and delete everything to and from CB.  There were a  couple that were so happy and sweet that my finger did NOT want to press down.  I thought, "Maybe I'll just save these two. No! I can't. Uuuuugggghhhhh. Maybe I'll open this one and read it just once more."  Get a grip, Kate.[Delete]

The chronically loose screw in my keyboard tray has fallen out and disappeared, so I'm holding it together with a paperclip.

We finally heard back from the Migration Policy Institute about the Immigrant Integration Awards.  We were not selected.  Remember how I spent most of the month of December banging my head against the wall, shouting, "I can't do that right now!  I'm writing MPI!"?  I didn't really expect that we would get it; but it was a little spark that persisted.  The money reeeeaaaaallllly would have helped us.

Administrative Staff spent an hour in the morning and another hour or so in the afternoon trying to hash out the budget for next year.  Let's just say that it wasn't pretty.  I was home with my kids during the morning (spring break), so was "conferenced in" for the morning skirmish.  Since my hands-free headset is kaput, I was trying to hold the handset and dry off from my shower, towel my hair and deal with this very important conversation (naked, because it is hard to get dressed without putting the phone down...) from a distance while my kids and their friends were playing that mysterious game which involves lots of banging in Nate's room.   Plus, it meant didn't get to run.

A double hug from volunteer Bill S.:  one from him and an extra, proxy hug from my friend Naomi, whom he saw at the university today, and who sends her love.

Store signs forwarded to me from my friend Diane, courtesy of

The State Office of Education called and asked me to do another training for them this spring.  That is three trainings in the space of only a few weeks, and that means MONEY, for a girl who needs it.  Plus, judging by the speed with which the State Office pays its contractors, the checks won't arrive until my divorce is final.  I believe that means that it is MY money.

When I came into the office and told the staff that we needed to come up with solutions to the budget issue, everyone who was here spun her chair around and started brainstorming without complaint.

I am getting to know Laura, our new teacher.  She is also going through a divorce, loves camping and drinks beer. I wonder if she would come down to the Swell next month...

Nate has had a dry bed every night for nearly two weeks.  When I praised him for his success, he said, "I've gotta do it, Mom.  If I wet the bed, how am I gonna get a girl?"


  1. Bless Nate, but let's hope he stays away from girls and relationships for us long as possible hey! They are far too complicated and confusing. Sounds like you needed hugs, if I could I would give you one. But I'll send one instead. Can you feel it?

  2. Jeezo Pete, I don't come around for a week and you went and DID IT. You found your fuck-you place and worked it. I know it was hard. is the right place to be for now. The LAST thing you need on your plate is a relationship with a guy committed to someone else.

    And now I have to board my plane. I am at my layover and I just ate a hot dog. Yes. An airport hot dog. Bing's blood pressure would hit the ceiling if she could see how much I enjoyed that damn thing.